i was reading my archives. now that i am turning 21, i thought it was rather suitable.

i was sucha joyous and happy kid back then. very crazy, kinda haphazard, a bull in a chinashop, living my life without a care, not because of very strong faith back then, but cos i think i didnt know anything. five years passed. grown older, spent more time thinking, still cant hold a conversation. a little weary, disillushioned with life before, but more certain of my position in God. i wouldnt know how to live life like before. joy came for the bbq just now, she was talking to mr joshua. mr joshua said that if he could live his life again, he would change parts of it. i just looked up - i wouldnt want to change anything at all. for twenty years of my life, i risen and fallen and some things dont matter as much now because all that endless pursuit of it during my youth made me tired and made me see the neccessary evil of it.